Results

As you may recall (if you don’t, never fear) I attempted to write a feature film screenplay in one week (for no other reason than to show how foolhardy I am I guess), and, was reasonably successful, although, the exercise may or may not have contributed to a nearly complete physical and metal collapse I had that lasted several weeks (poor diet and nearly round the clock work every day of the week every week of the year may have been another factor). At any rate, I got a nearly 120 page screenplay at the end of it that I was reasonably happy with.

Rather than sharing it with a whole lot of people, I gave it to only one (a producer) and got nearly immediate and constructive feedback.

Fired-up and enthusiastic, I started work immediately on the second draft, which I would circulate to a wider group and use to begin moving toward production. It was easy and fun; I knew where the problem areas were in the script from a pure audience-pleasing angle (which I am more than happy to accommodate for this project, it being a popcorn-type thriller) and I knew where I had some lingering reservations when I’d finished typing “The End” on the last draft. I plowed right through and wrote a brand new opening in minutes flat, and new character introduction scenes nearly as quickly. I completely changed the location of the story and the circumstances and it didn’t take me very long at all to get to the midpoint — the place where I was having so much trouble when I tried to craft the story originally.

Then it hit me. I wasn’t writing a horror film anymore. I mean, sure, there were horrific elements, (enough to maybe frighten my nephew five years ago) but it wasn’t the thrill ride that I wanted it to be. I thought and pondered for several days, then read through the material again and just couldn’t see where I went wrong. I came up with some pretty scary things and tried to wedge them in, but they just wouldn’t fit. Then I took some more time off and thought about it a little longer.

It’s amazing what you can find to do when you’re avoiding writing. I actually came up with two other film ideas, ideas that seemed a whole hell of a lot more interesting and exciting than the one I was currently working on. I even went as far as to start outlining characters and plot for one of those ideas, but the nagging “unfinished business” flag in my head was flapping louder and louder, so rather than continue working on a new idea I went back to doing nothing about my current idea. I think a whole two weeks passed where I managed to keep away from looking at that half-blank page 63 where I knew that I had to come up with brilliant material so I could get on to the fantastic, heart-stopping ending that I already had. I did the math all sorts of ways and finally came up with 7 pages as being the amount of material I needed to fill in for this middle section so everything would work and it would still come out to the right length because it’s good to know what you’re up against. How hard could that be? 7 crummy pages!

Finally, (with some help, and how humiliating it was to have someone else point out what was wrong with my own finely-crafted horror story!) I realized that a full half of the first sixty pages I was happy with was completely wrong. I couldn’t believe it. I was utterly dumbfounded. It was like the person who’d written those pages knew nothing of the story of the characters or the situation. It was like they were writing just to get to point B. It was lazy writing.

What I am left with now, is scrapping most of what I did during my one-week first draft, and some of the leisurely second draft that I did immediately afterward. When the dust eventually settles, it looks like very little of that first draft will even exist anymore.

So, what have I learned? I think, despite all my back-patting and self-admiration that you definitely can’t write a screenplay in just one week. Sure, like I said before, it’s physically possible, but it’s not the end number of pages that makes a complete screenplay, it’s what’s in those pages. You need time for things to germinate and take root. None of that can be rushed.

Well, if nothing else, you can be sure that there is actually blood and sweat in this modest little horror screenplay. I have actually thought things through and agonized over it, not just rushed it out the door and shouted “Done! What’s next?”

Conclusion … How not to write a screenplay: plow through with only a rough idea where you’re going in an arbitrary time period, forcing yourself to come up with ideas on the spot, rather than letting them develop naturally.

Having said all that, I probably wouldn’t have sat down and finished the first draft had I not set that goal for myself, so, not a complete loss. I’m going to leisurely give myself the rest of this month to finish a second draft (wedged in between other work) that I am happy with and I guess see where things go from there.

If you’re impatient, you can follow my every breath and bowel movement on Twitter, as several enterprising, yet misguided people seem to be doing now.

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